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CRIME DOLLS
 

These dolls are all custom made. Your selection may be slightly different than represented below. However, will be just as entertaining.   All Dolls are $20.00 each and include any shipping fee within the continental United States.

Bar Fly Doll

BAR FLY JUDY

We all know her she is the ugly one with big hooters. After the 5^th drink she looks pretty good. Only because  you aren't looking above her neck line.

Barfly Judy comes with a Full selection

A condom and pin so you can

trap that man into a relationship;

a ru486 morning after pill,  if she changes her mind; A pleasure cock ring; and some orgasmic sensual enhancement jell, because she is numb from the 6 guys before you.

BONDAGE BARBIE
 

Isn't it strange, Tying someone up and beating them with a whip is only illegal if they don't like it.

I had to spend lots of money on a Defense Attorney to learn that one. Bondage Barbie comes with a rubber gag ball, blindfold, and leg and wrist ties for all your Barbie fun. Whips and bondage chains sold separately.

First Period

CRAZY KATHY

Crazy Kathy likes to cut her self. It lets her feel something.  She also expresses herself with piercings. All those tender places you can't see are pierced. She says she belongs to the “ New Tribal People”.  We all know it is because daddy touched her. We will pretend it is cool.
 

Crazy Kathy comes with

an eye, nose, ear clit and nipple piercing, Plus a pair of scissors so she can cut herself.

MY FIRST PERIOD

Having your period isn't a crime

but we still think it is funny and real gross and anytime someone bleeds that much without a crime being committed is kinda freaky...

 My first period Kate comes with stained shorts and a real pad. we were going to add midol but decided that wouldn't be appropriate.
 

Hacksaw Hank

GOTH DOLL GRETA

Being a self mutilating depressed

downer, isn't a crime, but killing yourself no mater how pathetic you are, is. Goth doll Gretta comes with a razor for cutting herself  because she  needs “To feel something”. She also has a pen so she can write poetic suicide notes.

Hank is a twisted individual.

He likes saws, drills and all

forms of torture. It started off with little puppies and kittens. Now he usually finds whores or helpless

little kids. He needs quiet the

voices in his head.

Hack Saw Hank Comes with

bloody body parts a hard hat, a hack saw and safety boots to keep his feet warm and dry

ABDUCTION ANNIE

Being in love with a sick pervert

isn't a crime but being abducted by one is.  Abduction Annie Shouldn't have gone on that Internet date.

Her boyfriend Loves her so much it

hurts. It mainly hurts her but we know  love and pain are intertwined.

Abduction Annie comes with

Bound legs and arms, and lots

of bruises and  blood. She doesn't

have any panties because

her boyfriend took those.
 

Keeping the money you earn isn't a crime. Unless you don't pay Uncle Sam.. Or pimp Leon.

Too bad prostitution is a crime because a whore-union      with medical benefits would be great. Especially after your Pimp finds that roll of $100s you been holding out .

PRETTY VIVIAN

Having a hormone problem isn't a crime but not having  all your excess body hair removed  should be. Come on ladys we don't want you to have more facial hair than we do. About that Muff of yours, Have you ever thought what it would be like to lick an ice cream come with a Don King wig on it.

Shave it down or we are gonna stop going down..

In My Butt Barbie  Stuffing things in your butt isn't a crime but stuffing things up someone else's butt while they are sleeping is. That is what one of our Post cards said a sweet lady did to her boyfriend. That's not nice.

In my butt Barbie comes with a Champagne bottle, glass, and a mirror, so Barbie can watch all that anal fun. See what you can shove in her ass.

Planting land mines is illegal

Shooting the guy who plants the

mine is ok, even if you are in his country.  Land mine Betty isn't a anti-war doll. She is a fallen American hero who has given up her freedom to the UN.

Land Mine Betty Comes with a M16 rifle with a grenade  Launcher, lots of bloody gauze, and a single boot because one is all she needs.

Having a muff that looks like you have Don King in a leg lock isn't a crime, but having your boyfriend choke to death while trying to give you oral pleasure should be. I wonder if holding you down and shaving your muff against your will is a crime. It shouldn't be

Natural Nina comes with a comb and hair dryer so she can fluff her muff for that important date.

SLUTTY MARY

What if Mary was Jesus' bratty little slut sister?  What if she was crucified instead of Jesus?

We know Jesus was guiltless and we are sure this little bitch committed several crimes, so we crucified her ourselves.... Die
bitch die..  Sister Mary comes with 4 crucification spikes, thats one extra, a crown of thorns and her confirmation party dress.

TAMMY FAY BAKER ZOMBIE DOLL

Dieing of Breast cancer isn't a crime, But bilking your followers out of  their hard earned money is. Tammy Fay Baker and her husband Jim are both freaky looking people so being dead

hasn't affected their looks much.

Tammy comes with her own mastectomy,  life like make up, and a shovel so she can dig her self out of her grave if Jesus decides to heal her

PERFECT WIFE WANDA

Getting Married isn't a crime but nagging your boyfriend to marry you should be. Can you imagine being able to do what you wanted on your wedding night?
 

Perfect wife Wanda comes with a gag so you don't have to listen to her complain, bound legs so she can't say “Not tonight, I have a headache” A blind fold so she can't see your socks on the floor, and a Royal Scepter so she will feel like a Queen

We know thatbeing a Transvestite isn't a crime... But, having the shit kicked out of you because the redneck you just blew found out you are a guy, is.

So, go ahead and dress the way you want, besides we like womens' underwear um...but usually just on women...  Trany Top Girl is anotomically correct for your enjoyment. Comes with a party gown and extra pretty hair.

Dong Da Wang Gu Guy

Jerking off isn't a crime. But jerking off in public is.. Remember Pee Wee Herman?

 We feel bad for this little doll. His wife and daughter left him because of his chromic Internet masturbation...

 MR. Dong comes with a roll of toilet paper so he can clean up his wang goo. And as you can see there is plenty of that..